----- My
friend and I spent many hours of our lives sitting in darkened theater
staring at images flickering on a silver screen. I don't recall
very many of the movies we saw, but I do recall two separate occasions
when everything else took a backseat to the events that happened
prior to the start of the feature presentation.
----- Each instance occurred under
similar circumstances as I made my way into the theatre and awaited
the arrival of my hungry and thirsty friend. The first found me
sitting in the middle of a very crowded row. When we first arrived,
it was empty, but by the time my friend made his was back to the
seating area, arms full of food and drink, the row was full, the
theatre was dark, and the previews had begun. When he arrived at
our row, he began making his way to the center, trying hard not
to step on anyone’s toes or crown anyone with a cold drink.
----- I will never forget hearing him
approaching, whispering repeatedly, “excuse me, excuse me,
excuse, me…” As he got closer, I could here the plea
for pardon more clearly. Then much to my surprise he said the same
to me, then to the person beside me, and then to the person beside
him. He must have gone on past me for six or seven people before
I got his attention and he realized his mistake. As he began his
backtrack journey, virtually the entire audience burst into laughter.
Neither of us wanted to show our face at movies’ end.
----- The second occurrence stands
as one of the funniest moments in my life, though I have to admit
it certainly falls in the “you had to be there” category.
Still, it bears telling. On this occasion, the theatre was nowhere
near as crowded and the lights were still on as I awaited his return.
I thought I heard a slight commotion on the aisle behind me just
before he arrived at our seats. I was correct, for as he came to
sit down beside me with an unusually enormous soft drink in his
hands, I noticed he was laughing. Then, in a very boastful tone
he told me the story.
----- “I was walking down the
aisle and I dropped my coke. It hit the floor and just stood up.
It didn’t spill a drop, NOT A SINGLE DROP!” And then,
as if on cue, exactly as he said the word “drop,” Whoooooosh!
The entire bottom fell out of the cup and into his lap.
----- I don’t think we saw a
bit of the movie for the endless laughter that ensued.
© 2004
The Trill House
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